Jumat, 29 Maret 2019

in this sunny day, something attacks me.





when i cracked up a glass,
i miss the sound that i didn't hear a bit long time,
the sound that i miss all of sudden,
that is the sound of someone's nagging.

it might be weird,
but that is how i felt.

you know,
when you miss someone but you still have uneasy feeling left inside your chest?
you probably can't understand it if we aren't in the same boat.

i just understand,
nagging is not always mean they are angry,
there also a caring feeling when they are angry,
and once again, i just knew it so late.

when she stopped nagging,
i was waiting for it,
but she didn't do it.

is this 'unfortunate story' or 'missing someone killing you slowly' story?

Sabtu, 22 Desember 2018

Jumat, 09 November 2018

randomly perfekt




i will post some pics took by me, from a long time ago.
chill out.
grab your coffee.
and flush it out.
lol.

non-aestethic pics.
not-a-photographer-look-like-pics.
and just me, took randomly.
no technique. just enjoy snapping all the things.





just how many times i said that this store is my favorite? hahaha. seriously, this store is a small one that is not everyone really notice it and the place is near my house. i saw so many 80s and 90s style. there were so many old clothes and band shirts. i bought one and my brother too. took a lot of pic lol too shy to upload it on social media, not really good too.



everyone could realized where is this in a glance. haha, a famous one, from a mall.



this stray cat is from my uni. he keep take a glance at me when i ate in canteen. idk if he sees me as a weird person or he want my food? 


FOR THIS ONE, a friend of mine took this pic for me with my name on it, in front of my husbands' building, JYP Entertainment building. 



i think this was from Eid in 2017. such a great view in early morning.


i haven't have a chance to upload this pic on my IG, because i'm running out of words for the caption lol can i just skip to write the caption session? i think this pic when i still being a college student back then. 


can i skip this pic because too sad to remember. but still upload this. what's wrong with me haha



i often come to this island, because...... just because. i have been there for about... 3 times? this is untung jawa island. not really cool, but if you ride a bicyle and go around the island, you will find some good place to take a moment in silent. 
ps: this island is not too big.


from istiqlal mosque with some of my friends in college.


<3

Rabu, 17 Oktober 2018

without her.






without her,
the room feels so empty,
twas noisy, and now quiet.

without her,
the things quite messed up,
something doesn't feel so right.

without her,
the happiness is not literally mean happy,
only 80%.
cause she is gone.

without her,
the days feel so dark, even though there is a light.

without her,
the distance feel so close yet so far.


//


i don't want to see her even in my dream,
i don't want to meet her in person.

i just want to know what she is up to,
and how is she doing now?
good or bad?
that is all i want to know.

the problem she began, it's too hard to handle.
the mistakes she ever had, it's too hard to forgive.
but that is what human being do, we are not perfect anyway.
missing her in silent and forgive her day by day seems so hard,
but what else can i do?

i hope you always doing good and always in the right path.
find your own happiness.
i will show you the real happiness later.
not in the near future, it took a long time.
wait for me.


ã…¡ 17:26  ã…¡ 17.10.2018 ã…¡

Jumat, 03 Agustus 2018

friendship.





[this post gonna be a bit emotional]



what is the meaning of friendship?
is that necessary?
i think they will always around as always.
no matter what happen.
that is what i thought.

i thought they will stay forever.
but that is wrong.

i never imagined this before,
i never thought they will really go away and cut down the communications,
they even disappeared.

i never blame them,
i just still wondering what is my fault?
at least give me an explanation,
at least give me a hint,
at least tell me what did i do?

i think our friendship gonna be last forever,
and we won't ever be in this kind of situation,
i think we will always be fine,
but that is all of the thoughts when i never learn something from the past,
when i was an innocent and stupid.

now, losing friends are the real problem for me,
but i think i won't thinking much about it,
people might see i just exaggerating things,
but i do and don't care.

the more i'm thinking about it,
the more i've been blame myself.

the real lesson about this is,
learn how to letting go,
learn how to accept reality,
learn how to accept the things that doesn't happen like what i've been expected,
so many new things i have been learnt.

another important fact is,
losing friends is a part of growing up,
cool, i can count it as a part of growing up from now.

i still have a sense that they are still there,
but we are just didn't meant to be friend in a long term,
and we are being apart, because we have different goals and that is naturally happened.
maybe?

it's okay.
maybe this is my fault for ever do something wrong,
that is how i always said to myself.
not trying to playing as a victim though.

this is the last message i want to drop here,
regarding this topic,
thank you for everything, we had so many good memories,
thank you for ever count me in as your close friend,
if you read this, you might know this is about you,
say hi is okay,
and ignore this is okay as well,
i just want you to know that i really want to know how is your condition now,
thank you and sorry.

Rabu, 11 Juli 2018

Life.





Life is a bless,
Life is such the best gift for the people who remains alive until now,
Eventhough it's a lucky or unlucky life,
But life still a bless from the creator, Allah.

We should always be thankful for this beautiful gift,
We should always remember that we are lucky enough for live our life until now,
Aren't we so lucky and special that we are still breathing in this life?

I know we are not always have a good days,
Bad days come often as well.
But that doesn't mean you need to end up here,
That doesn't mean you need to give up on this life.

Come back for what I have said,
We are so lucky and special for still alive and live our life until now.
So, let's appreciate every single thing, especially life itself.

I hope you and I will always be thankful for this life that we have until now.










**this is not a poem :( just........ some thought? :-D sorry for grammatical error**

Sabtu, 05 Mei 2018

My favorite quotes.





Hello!!

What a tiring month,
But never get tired of the quotes!

I like quotes. Especially the one that could motivated myself. 
Most of quotes that I will share below is from thegoodquote!


So, here is my favorite quotes!






1. THIIIIIIISSSSS! I recently feel that I am always happy for no reason. Eventho there were so many problem, but be happy is a must! Still~ and don't find it with a reason, because you can lost in any time.









































2. Because someone who is doing it with half-heartedly is the most annoying. Just choose to stay or leave hahahhha.








3. I agree, if I can keep it by myself, I will do it! Because sometimes it will prevent the problem or the story for getting bigger too.

































4. I thought forever is nothing...... But I have found it. I will run and try my best to reach it.




5. This is work. Because when you are angry, you only filled with a negative things whispered by satan. So whatever you do can causing more problem. (I admit it this is a bit hard :") )





6. Yeeeeeeeas! Because all the things in the world is already setted up by Allah. <3





7. Announce to the boys around world~ please make Prophet Muhammad as your role model! He is perfect :")











8. Yeah, that is right. There is one biggest problem in my life, I thought I can't go thru it, but look who is getting stronger here. Alhamdulillah.



(If you are wondering what is this about, this ain't related with love things.)










9. I swear I ever feel this way too. I thank to Allah so much :"( this is always reminds me with my sin as well.......... and make me want to be the best. ( I tried )






















10. In the end, the one who should receive most of your love is yourself first, not others. If you success for doing it, you can love another people wholeheartedly.



























11. YES! Because when you feel you have a bad day, it will last 24 hours. And Insya Allah, you have another day to build a happy day with Allah's blessed.



























Okay, let's end here. Bye.